Wednesday, March 30, 2011

The 3rd wheel

This is something I found in my blackberry from last Fall. Just decided to finish it so I wanted to hear your thoughts on social networks and relationships.

I always try to image life before the 90's. The fashion was definitely hot prior to the 90's but technology sucked. Can you imagine those nights sun down to sun up in your school computer lab without Google? Group projects without cell phones and email? Wild shit right, tell me about it. But the blessing of technology and the Internet is a bittersweet relationship. Now in 2010 technology we live twice, once in reality and secondly via status updates. We are able to connect, share, laugh, and love our family and friends close and afar through social websites. We all know though that plenty of people use social websites for purposes other than actually networking. Instead of paying for and getting charged to find individuals compatible with you, you can join Facebook and search for women in a specific region and poke away. Some women have found that mountain of "greatness" and grabbed the attention of others through "model" pics. Some professional or some not, like the infamous bathroom mirror shots in little to no clothing. Social networks also give you the chance to display your orientation and relationship status, which is irrelevant to plenty of fiendish love seekers, with a society where infidelity is embraced and expected. But you can be your own worst enemy compared to all the friendly with filthy intention Facebook messages and pokes your mate will receive. Do you think your Internet relationship should change due to your real life relationship changes? If you always posted model pics glorifying your assets should you take them down and discontinue posting? There is no way to stop men from gazing and commenting because of a relationship change. Men are also subject to changes after getting into a relationship. Men may refer to their female friends as babe, boo in a strictly friendly fashion. Is it right for a woman to tell her boyfriend he has to choose his words better when writing on walls and commenting on pics? Think about the wall he may be writing on also, what if she is involved with someone. Her boyfriend will not be trilled seeing a man referring to his lady as babe, cutie etc. Since college and the erection of Facebook, MySpace etc. I have seen, heard and been involved with relationship quarrels over the aforementioned situations some much smaller, refusing to change status to "In a relationship" to bigger, with ex lovers trying to rekindle a flame via the social networks.  How can you avoid altercation with a potential baby mother/father (j/k) in regards to your interactions on the Internet?.

1.    Don’t join or deactivate your accounts
2.    Being #1 is not an option for most you can try not being friends with your loved one online
3.    Rise above the ignorance, we have been programmed now to not trust the opposite sex but give your lover the benefit of the doubt that they are genuine and true to you.  What happens in the dark will come to light no need to cyber stalk to find clues.

Why the hell do you need to let all your virtual friends know you recently got involved or broke up with a person?  Ever sat in the middle of a couple’s argument while commuting to work?  John Doe is no longer in a relationship with Jane Doe.  Five minutes later John is now in a relationship with Jane.  Twelve hours later they are no longer in a relationship again. Like what the hell do people argue with their finger on the mouse?. Remember when you got a boyfriend/girlfriend from a piece of paper with circle Yes/No/Maybe? We have become slaves to our technology and let it into our bedrooms. Another good way to avoid future arguments and issues is changing your style from now. I know plenty of you mean no harm when you refer to your friends as hun and babe but people read into everything and insecurity is present to some extent in every relationship. So give your self a head start and break out of those habits. I can't really give suggestions to the model pic situations. I never seen America's Top Model recruit girls via social network profiles so use your common sense. Put more effort into achieving your dream if you really want to be a model instead of posting half naked pictures on the Internet to obtain attention of lame horny guys. Gentlemen go read a book on hooking up with girls or something also. I have looked through a female's photo album and seen a guy; sometimes they come in a bunch, commenting on all the same pictures. If you walk down the street and see a bunch of beautiful women do you stop them all to give them compliments? Actually some lame dudes do that. The rules of engagement should not be different via reality and the Internet. 
Thirsty is the new swag
I throw up in my mouth every time I see a status of someone who has tried to create a new life or personality via these social networks.  Who are you trying to impress?  The Internet has become the Summer Jam screen so eventually you will be exposed so lets bring it down a notch and be yourself. We have become slaves, myself included at one point, to these networks. Discussing, posting filthy photographs and videos of our peers and spreading personal business of others on these networks.

We joke, we laugh at each other on these networks but the laughter stops once it turns to blood shed. (Most of us heard about the lady killed over a pair of pampers, if not click here).

More than likely you are involved in some social network so prepare yourself for change when that special someone enters your life. It would be a shame to lose someone you love over a wall post or direct message.


  1. I wrote a blog similar to this and came to the conclusion that Social Networking will not be allowed into the relationship

  2. LUVS IT! I agree with everything you wrote. The ups and downs of your relationship doesn’t need to be aired out on FB. On the other hand I know people who definitely create this false dual personality on FB allowing even their closest friends to believe their life is one way when its not.

  3. whats your link Katrese? Diane duel personality internet people need help I hate that they try to create an image on the web thx 4 reading ladies

  4. Sooo true Dru....another great post